Lust, Inevitably Leads To Loneliness Or Something Like That.

My Life Stories, From the highest to the lowest, and the grey area crap inbetween that forms my life so far…

Archive for the tag “content”

To Fill You In


Well I feel the need to fill you in on what’s happened between my new set of posts, and those previous 7ish months ago…. SO you can get a grip on why this feeling of happiness and such a wonderful date is an amazing change! Smile

So thinking of the past can give both pleasant, humorous, sad, embarrassing and shameful memories. for example over the last 8 months i have been  living far away from family and friends in Sydney and its pushed me through my last stages of choosing the self persecuting choices which led me astray towards a chaotic bipolar day to day living into this sense of independence and living happily content. It was during this time of chaos that my blog was practically a husk of what it used to be, and only written when I was on the happy side of this chaotic bipolar little slice of hell. To put it simply it was a series, well pretty much a pattern of “happy-disappointment-angry-upset-break up-apologies-false sense of happiness” for about 6 months. Yes if you’ve gathered so far I’m talking about my previous relationship, and now your probably thinking “why didn’t you end it sooner if you were so unhappy then?” well it wasn’t as easy that, I was both in denial and holding onto that last slither of hope that things would change, I’m not saying I wasn’t happy at all in this 6 month duration, but it was quenched and like a candle in the rain, it didn’t take long to go out.

But now the chaos is far from sight, further then the horizon. With many thanks to my friends of course who had to deal with such terror and unimaginable frustrations.

To those experiencing that chaos, I wish you good luck, and I really do hope things get better for you. But its your choice whether you want chaos over genuine happiness.

Yours the happily vibrant and un-chaotic

Alexander Vince

Happiness Is In The Eye Of The Beholder


Why is it that when a disaster or feeling of unhappiness strikes that the weather is miserable in compared to when happiness is on the rise; where the weather is beautiful, the sun is shining and the birds are singing. I’ve noticed over the last couple of weeks, that I’ve been in a constant happy state, even when work tonight was hard and mistakes were made. I brushed it off and continued be chirpy, quirky, and at the end of the night, down right dirty. Hehehe.

I feel cleansed with the sun(HAVE TO LOVE THE VITAMIN D!), healthy food, coffee, and yes I feel cleansed even though I smoke ironic I know. But this is one of the first times in a long time where stress is a far away thought, I have someone worth working towards and I’m happy for it to go either way, whether it doesn’t happen or does, happy, for her and for me, its a crazy feeling. To put it simply everything is going well, besides my empty stomach at the moment. I am content and the best thing about it is I’m not trying so hard to be happy! Its coming naturally!

Oh by the way I’ve got a bed time story for you!

I was at work one night a couple of weeks ago, taking this middle aged, early 50’s looking couple’s order, serving their drinks and food, the whole “waitering” kit and caboodle and while talking to them, we got onto the topic of why i came to be working at this particular restaurant(the history of Alexander Vince really). At the end of the night, this particular couple came to pay the bill, and they give me a 10 dollar tip as well as a note I quickly skimmed through the note and said thankyou with a smile. It barely occurred to me at the time, that this couple were swingers and in this particular note suggested they were interested in me to come over for a “private drink and/or meal”, so pretty much they’re saying “hey join our weird open relationship swinger couple gangbang orgy touch and see our sagging bums thing, and we’ll get you drunk for free and feed you if we have to.” I’m conflicted, I feel like I’ve been eye raped or perved on by my high school gym teacher yet I feel extremely complimented that I passed their criteria… But no way in hell did I call their number, I’m not interested in seeing all the sagginess that I will eventually be forced to see in thirty years time.

Yours the Good Ole’ Plain happy and swinger attracting

Alexander Vince

 

P.s

So you’ve heard of Edward scissor hands?

I BRING YOU ALEXANDER BOTTLE HANDS!

2011-09-15 04.06.24

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